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Seasons Greetings — Why Now?
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Seasons Greetings

Evergreen

Happy NODWISH Greetings

As a service to my readers I have compiled a list of useful terms for our modern global village.

It is time to wish family and friends: [select one]

Happy NODWISH
Merry Solstice
Happy Hanukkah
Happy Kwanzaa
С Рождеством Христовым
Sung Tan Chuk Ha
Vrolijk Kerstfeest
Nadolig Llawen
Fröhliche Weihnachten
Joyeux Noël
Buon Natale
Feliz Navidad
God Jul
Rauhallista Joulua
Happy Hogwatch
Happy Christmas

and hope they are visited by: [select one]

Дед Мороз
Saint Nicholas
Santa Claus
Kris Kringle
Pere Noël
Babbo Natale
Los Reyes Magos
Tomte
Joulupukki
Hogfather
Father Christmas

who leaves good things in their: [select one]

Stockings
Boots
Shoes
Clogs
Box
Pillow Case
[some people are greedy]

rather than the: [select one]

Lump of Coal
Raw Liver
Bloody Bones
Birch Switch
Sticks

some of them may deserve.

Don’t forget to leave out the: [select one]

Oats
Hay
Grass
Scraps
Turnips

For the: [select one]

Horses
Reindeer
Donkey
Camel
Goat
Boars

And: [select one]

Vodka & perozhki
Milk & Cookies
Wine & bread
Sherry & pork pie

For the driver.

Don’t forget, if you encounter O’Reilly or DonoWho this festive season the proper way of greeting them is “Happy Holidays”. If you say “Merry Christmas”, it would be like urinating on their yule log, putting out their fire.

12 comments

1 Kryten42 { 12.01.09 at 10:31 pm }

…and a Happy Hogwatch to you and family and friends, and all here! 😀

2 Kryten42 { 12.01.09 at 10:41 pm }

PS… I would have thought that the proper greeting upon encountering O’Reilly or DonoWho or Malkin etc, etc, would be something like:

Screaming “OhMyG*d! Satan LIVES!!!” (Running away very fast)… or,

“Gahhhh!! Help! Police!! Murder! Rape!! Help! Police! I seen [him/her] do it! It was [him/her]!! [He/She] did it!! Gahhhhhh!!” or…

“Thanks for everything you’ve done to us all! My turn!” *BANG* 😉 😛

Guess my preference? 😉 😈

3 cookie jill { 12.01.09 at 11:00 pm }

RAUHALLISTA JOULUA to you, too.
.-= last blog ..How Safe Is Your Chicken? =-.

4 hipparchia { 12.02.09 at 12:04 am }

Joulupukki and Fröhliche Weihnachten are fun to say, and we’re all hoping for a pillow case full of freeze-dried liver treats here!
.-= last blog ..My inner cryptobiologist lol’d at this one =-.

5 Bryan { 12.02.09 at 12:30 am }

My Great grandmother Dumka was not into treats, Hipparchia, and she is the source of the liver threat. It must be a Berliner thing. That is what my Dad and his siblings remember about her.

6 Bryan { 12.02.09 at 12:30 am }

I take requests, Jill, and include them as they occur.

7 hipparchia { 12.02.09 at 12:49 am }

i suspect that all but one of us would consider the raw liver a treat as well.
.-= last blog ..My inner cryptobiologist lol’d at this one =-.

8 Moi { 12.02.09 at 8:59 am }

So, is Nodwish really in 2010 this year, since we have a Blue Moon on the 31st?!
.-= last blog ..Michael’s Cryin Over Spilled Milk =-.

9 Bryan { 12.02.09 at 2:28 pm }

You have to watch liver consumption or they OD on Vitamin A, or so I’m told by my vet.

Nodwish is a solar holiday, so the poor moon is irrelevant. The moon gets “eaten” once a month, but the sun only does it once a year.

10 Steve Bates { 12.02.09 at 6:18 pm }

I thought JFK’s critics established once and for all that a “Berliner” is some sort of jelly donut…
.-= last blog ..‘We Cannot Afford This War’ =-.

11 Bryan { 12.02.09 at 8:24 pm }

“Ein Berliner” is a pastry. Berliners and Germans in other cities don’t use the indefinite article “ein” when referring to their home city. It is similar to the way Brits drop the definite article from some words especially institutions, i.e. “I’m going to hospital”, rather than the American “I’m going to the hospital”. I think it’s a matter of common usage, rather than a rule.

12 hipparchia { 12.02.09 at 8:25 pm }

You have to watch liver consumption or they OD on Vitamin A, or so I’m told by my vet.

that’s what i’ve read. no more than 10% of the diet, iirc, so yeah, a whole pillowcaseful might be a bit much.
.-= last blog ..My inner cryptobiologist lol’d at this one =-.