You Are Smarter Than This Guy
Update: because I couldn’t resist:
I have long complained about the media practice of sending some poor schlub out into the rain and winds of storms so the “folks at home” can experience how bad things are. I also complain about the idiots who head to the beach with their boards to “catch the awesome sets” that storms kick up as they approach.
Those people are Nobel Prize material compared this human shaped mildew. Channel 9 has video available so you can see what “Mr. Brilliant” did to himself because he thought kiteboarding in a tropical storm would be a great idea.
19 comments
…I am always reminded by episodes like this, much to the detriment of any personal sanguinity about the direction our nation is headed, that people like this have the right to vote…
Now that is scary, Jack.
I remember from Survival School the instructors constantly pounding on the fact, that if you parachute into the water, you “dump” the ‘chute as soon as your boots touch the water for precisely the reason shown on the video.
I don’t know about that, Jack. K. … did the fellow survive? Yes, I know; there’s a tradition here in Texas of votes from the graveyard…
They issue annual so-called Darwin Awards, but the selection in this case seems highly unnatural to me. The best statement of good will I can manage is this: if this man lives, I hope the only permanent injury he sustains is to his reproductive ability. We don’t need any more like him.
My brain-dead cats have better judgement than this guy.
I checked out this type of “recreation” and discovered that the majority of the harnesses sold are designed to make separation of the “kite” difficult, many using a deep snaphook. Even if you want to dump the kite, it would be difficult. It may have something to with the fact that the “kites” sell in the $1K range.
Maybe I should look up my Dad’s design for an exploding bolt.
teh stoopid, it
burnsbreaks bones.We can hope he learned something, but I doubt it.
Ohhhkayyyyyy… Yeah. I like Cat’s BTW… Have I mentioned I like cat’s? Cats are smart. 🙂
Just saying. 😀 😉
Ummm… lesse… a topic comment… Hmmmm… Well, u r right about the ‘chute training Bryan. We had to practice in all weather and even the dreaded (and oft dangerous) HALO jump! If you survive the first HALO here, you are allowed to be DnD (drunk and disorderly) for that night. (Though, you do have to be *Fit for duty* the following morning.) 😉 Errm, for those that don’t know, HALO is *High Altitude, Low Opening* Jump. It’s fun. Aha.
“… sending some poor schlub out into the rain and winds…”
I didn’t notice earlier, but a pair of brothers in Ohio named Schlub… I kid you not… built my treble and tenor viols about 25 years ago. I never knew they did weather broadcasts for a living… as instrument makers, the Schlubs were anything but schlubs. I still have the viols, and the tenor was recently restored to like-new condition by a musician colleague who borrowed it for a while.
Oh, yeah, HALO is fun – if the altimeter is working, or you can recognize ground markers, or your count is correct – otherwise you only do it once. No thank you. Vietnam era flight pay was $125/month and jump pay was $55/month – the reason was anyone crazy enough to voluntarily jump out of a perfectly good airplane probably wouldn’t notice the difference.
Air Force ‘chutes had a built in altimeter set to deploy 10 seconds after you hit 10,000 feet, but you didn’t trust it. When it was necessary we were a good deal lower than that, and you used manual after you cleared the aircraft.
Steve, there are a lot of jewelers in Germany who don’t understand why Americans laugh at their signs.
We had an amusing instructor… at least, he thought he was amusing!
He said that if you noticed the ground getting closer, you had time to say “Oh shit!” And they’d be sure to inscribe your last words on the headstone properly. 🙂 Of course, that was a day jump… at night, you’d never know.
We had two altimeters, a digital and and old reliable vintage analog type. One of the main problems was the oxygen regulator or heater failing (It’s bloody cold and air is thin way up there!)
We used to joke they called it HALO on account of the fact that you were likely to have one to go with the wings you’d also receive after a failed jump. LOL
I have to admit though, the Military here were VERY careful about the equipment and training. Anyone who got to HALO training had probably cost the taxpayers about a $million, and they wanted a return on the investment! So killing someone with a jump wasn’t considered good form. 😉 I’d only heard about one death, but details were scarce.
Steve: Yeah, well made instruments are a prize possession! A friend of mine restored an antique classical guitar that had belonged to his deceased wife (with a hand-painted wooden case) that was passed on to his daughter. I think they had to send it to someone in Spain to restore it, and it took a year or so. It had a beautiful sound. 🙂
We had a similar thing about, if you could identify objects on the ground, you had better have already deployed your ‘chute because you were about to meet the earth.
Our big problem is that water was the most likely landing site we would have based on where we were flying, and there are no visual markers, which is why the system was set set for 10 seconds after 10K. We we using the 28’ round canopies, so there wasn’t a lot of control unless you cut the four lines in the rear, and they were dreaming if they thought I was going to bring a knife close to those lines. Later issue had a release method for those lines that didn’t involve cutting.
The canopies had different colored panels, white, orange and camo, which were useful after you touched down, but on the way it guaranteed you were an excellent target no matter what the lighting conditions.
Oh, yes, a lot of fun.
I saw this on CNN or something yesterday morning. This is what I like to refer to as “gene pool chlorination” Last I heard he was in critical condition.
Ya think?
From the video I would say he had the equivalent of two 40 mph motorcycle accidents within a minute of each other while wearing shorts.
Oh, that was BRILLIANT!
I don’t think he received any style points for his landing.
I think you’re right. Neither one of his landings.
The Ukrainian judge is so harsh!
Human shaped mildew. Thanks. The keyboard at work is now soggy from my in opportune timing for a heart “gawfah.?
I understand about having a leash to your board in regular surfing, because the board floats, and if you get dumped off shore you want something that floats around. Making the leash to that parasail nearly permanent is stupid beyond belief. Hopefully they will learn from this and redesign the system.
Oh, sorry about the system, Jill.
It’s a holdover from the Cold War, Map.