Warning: Constant ABSPATH already defined in /home/public/wp-config.php on line 27
In Local News — Why Now?
On-line Opinion Magazine…OK, it's a blog
Random header image... Refresh for more!

In Local News

Orlando Sentinel: Cops ask for guns, get missile launcher

Orlando emptied its bureau drawers and closets Friday of more than 300 unwanted guns — and one surface-to-air missile launcher.

The shoulder-fired weapon showed about 6 p.m. when an Ocoee man drove to the Florida Citrus Bowl to trade the 4-foot-long launcher for size-3 Reebok sneakers for his daughter.

Sarasota Herald-Tribune: It’s the stuff of horror: a bay jaunt, and a shark

It was only the seventh reported unprovoked shark bite in Sarasota County since 1882, and the second one this year, according to the International Shark Attack File at the Florida Museum of Natural History in Gainesville.

The boat was isolated, the wind was light and there was little light other than the green glow from the algae when the swimmers or other fish stirred the water.

What’s the matter with that girl, didn’t she see Jaws? The 6-foot bull shark that munched on her did, and knew that it had to do its duty to sharks everywhere – when a 20-year-old girl takes a nighttime swim in your waters, you are required to bite her. [It’s part of the code of sharks, lawyers and politicians are exempt.]


1 hipparchia { 08.19.07 at 2:35 am }

i see she’s a former biology major who now studies international relations. seems apt.

2 Bryan { 08.19.07 at 11:02 am }

A little more time in a video store and she would never have done it. I loved her idiot friend: “Should I call 911?”

Every time I start thinking that some horror flick is totally bogus because because no one would be stupid enough to: open the door, go to the basement, swim at night, etc., the news proves me wrong as some new candidate for a Darwin shows up.

3 hipparchia { 08.19.07 at 11:02 pm }

don’t count on it. i’ve lived most of my life on the gulf coast of somewhere; been surfing, scuba diving, shark fishing; saw jaws, in a movie theater, no less.

but when i had the chance to go skinny-dipping in a spetacularly bright patch of bioluminescence late one night, i didn’t pass it up either. there are an awful lot of us in the world who’ve never got the darwin awards we so richly deserve. for which i am truly grateful.

should i call 911? that was priceless. who need sharks when you’ve got friends like that?

4 Bryan { 08.20.07 at 12:08 am }

The bait fish are moving closer in for some reason and the sharks follow them. We have had more bull sharks around our bridges for the last couple of years.

The bait fish eat the algae and the sharks eat the bait fish.

5 hipparchia { 08.20.07 at 7:04 am }

loop current is in ur gulf, harassing all ur fishez
or more algae means more runoff, or the changes in rainfall have affected nearshore salinity, or….

6 Bryan { 08.20.07 at 12:36 pm }

Yeah, lots of data, but no information.